Reeling From Divorce? How to Heal After a Bad Divorce



If you are in the midst of a divorce, you gave up so much to make a marriage work. It didn’t. If he left you, then you are holding a bag of resentment and hurt. If you left him, you’ve been grieving the loss of your marriage for some time. We all want to rage at the world, or crawl into a depressed spot when we feel the injustice and randomness of our pain.

635257069851892370Fotolia_41981764_XS


How do you get over a bad divorce and heal from the emotional upheaval ?

People tell you to “move on” or, to “let it go” but that is easier said than done. You need to heal; but how?

Letting go of the hopes and dreams we had for a marriage is difficult. It takes time and patience with yourself and your rollercoaster emotions.

The key to moving on is the work of taking control back and owning your life – and believe it or not, there’s a psychological technology for this. It’s called Radical Acceptance. As long as you live in regret, anger, anxiety and fear, there is no going forward.

Six Steps to Healing After Divorce:

Give Yourself Permission to Mourn:

You sacrificed a lot for your marriage and it didn’t work out, feeling hurt, anger, remorse, guilt, or shame is normal. Your will have to go through all the steps of grief. Denial, Bargaining, Anger, Depression and Acceptance will all course through you like tsunamis trying to take over.

Get a good therapist and grieve properly. You may still be angry with your narcissistic ex or your adulterous husband, and that is a part of the healing process. If, however, you get stuck in one of the phases of grief, like anger or depression, make sure that you have a good therapist and support group to help you get unstuck.